I agree with the "I'm going to pretend this fandom doesn't exist" feeling. And I'm also someone who likes reading meta, but also writing it. However I haven't done that publicly/semi-publicly in a long time.

I have several pieces of media where I love the subject deeply, but I absolutely hate the parts of fandom I can find in the standard social media spheres. I can't even bring myself to read their meta posts these days, unless they're from decades ago. It makes me hesitant to even check out the fan spheres in DW, even if they're active, because of the black/white thinking. And the highly political and aggressive posts, as well.

I'd like people to not take media so seriously as that it has to be completely morally pure, but also take the media with enough weight that they can't just rewrite all the characters to be whatever they want them to be, either.